A Brief Explanation of the Government Shutdown

Just when we thought the government couldn't fuck up any more things, they actually shut down themselves. Welcome to post-government shutdown America, friends. Let's jump right in and figure out what the hell that means.

Fuck you, guys.

If you're like me, when the news of the government shutdown reached you, you likely shrugged and continued about your day. But for many Americans (including you), this could be a major fucking problem.  Economic collapse notwithstanding, the National Park System will be closing down, 400,000 civilian government employees may be sent home, and people looking to get loans may be told to go screw themselves.  On the bright side, the IRS won't be auditing anyone for a bit. (But you still have to pay your taxes.) 

To put it quite plainly, during this "dark period," (which is the first one in 17 years, by the way) the government discontinues services that are deemed nonessential. The mail will still run and the military will still remain intact, but plenty of other services (including trash collection in DC) will be suspended. Now, for your average American citizen, this doesn't mean jack shit in the short run. But give it a while, and our economy will start seeing adverse effects. Not to mention, hundreds of thousands of federal employees will literally not be receiving an income until the President signs a spending bill. 

The shutdown is a result of the House and Senate refusing to agree on a bill, due to House GOP vehemently disagreeing with the inclusion of funding for the Affordable Care Act. On Monday night, House Republicans attempted to engage in a conference in order to "negotiate the differences between the House and Senate bills" but Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid (D-Nev.) refused the offer. Whether or not this was a last ditch effort by Republicans to appeal to the nation and appear negotiable is up for debate. The unfortunate state of the country remains, however, and because the government refused to get along, millions of people will be negatively affected. The true icing on the cake is that Obamacare, the very program Republicans were trying to stop, will be going into effect anyway, despite desperate attempts to defund it. 

I hope I was able to explain the shutdown a little better for anyone who might have been confused. I know I still am. It's a shame we live in a country where legal jargon is so goddamn complicated that only the assholes that dictate the laws can understand it. But I will do my best to keep up with this and continue to put out the facts as I see them. If you're a government worker, I wish you the best in this difficult time. Thank you for reading today and share/comment on/like my shit so that I can reach more eyes and ears of eager citizens, waiting to be blessed with wit and half-informed opinion. Until next time!