The Morning WTF: Mumford and Sons Finally Get Something Right

It's Monday! The day where every mild-mannered office worker or student gets to be an amateur comic and clumsily quote Office Space. Why, no, I didn't have a "case of the Monday's" until your stupid face showed up! But as unbearable as your peers and coworkers may be, I'm here to remedy your situation with funny words and accompanying pictures for my less educated audience. (Read: Morons) Also, here is a great picture to start your day!

Because marketing.

Now, on to your Morning WTF! 

Weird: Sudeikis and Sons

If you're a fan of Mumford and Sons, you're also probably the kind of person that thinks they're music is thought-provoking and unique. You are wrong on both accounts and also probably think that Coldplay invented rock and roll. But despite your shortcomings, today is your day to shine as a Mumford and Sons fan. 

The boring, unvarying "folk" group just released a music video finally worth watching. The reason? They're not in it. Their mouth-full-of-marbles voices are still in it, but they are replaced by four much more interesting people. Jason Sudeikis plays the role of the lead singer, Will Forte plays the bass in a comically unkempt beard, Ed Helms slams away at the piano, and everyone's favorite Jason Bateman shreds the banjo. 

It's not laugh out loud funny, but it's sure to garner a chuckle or two. Warning to any easily offended people: There is a hot kiss shared among two individuals. The assault on "traditional marriage" may cause some to implode and burst into fits of rage. (Damn you, things that have little to no effect on me!)

So, yes, Mumford and Sons done good with this music video and actually made it worth listening to one of their songs to the end. Their musical style may be sleep inducing, but at least their taste in comedy is spot on.

Topical: Embassies In the Middle East Shutting Down Due to Terrorist Threats

Several embassies across the Middle East and North Africa are shutting their doors after rumors of terrorist threats by al-Qaeda. The embassies will be closed through August 10th, which prompts the questions: What if the terrorists just postpone their supposed attacks until then? Is there some sort of terrorist rule that says you can't attack a US embassy after the first ten days of the month? I mean, hell, the worst terrorist attack in US history happened on the 11th of a month so that theory doesn't fly. (Pun intended) However, I digress.

Max Read of the ever snarky Gawker seems unfazed by the threats and comments that "terrorists don't need to do anything besides exist to disrupt and discomfort America's diplomatic presence overseas." He has a point, of course, considering that the only information we have received on these threats is that the terrorists are planning a terrorist attack, based on intercepted communications. I imagine that this is just another normal day at the office for al-Qaeda. So what makes these threats different than what they do on any other given day?

"We received information that high level people from al-Qaeda in the Arabian Peninsula are talking about a major attack," Representative Dutch Ruppersberger (D-MD)-ranking member of the House Intelligence Committee and incredibly German individual- told This Week. "And these are people at a high level."

Whether or not this is a real threat or just media hype fueled by a slow weekend is yet to be seen. I'm hoping for the latter.

Funny: Man vs Bottle, Bottle Wins

We've all struggled trying to open a bottle before. Those bastards are occasionally screwed on there pretty tight. But most of us don't have biceps the size of a normal man's torso. In the following video, an incredibly muscular man tries to open a bottle and fails miserably. Let's watch!

I think the greatest part about this video is that the commentators are mocking him the entire time. Whatever game was going on was clearly not interesting enough for them to pay attention to and they, instead, directed their focus on this poor dude struggling to open a fucking Aquafina. But their commentary paid off and, for that, we here at The Daily Wit thank you. 

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